Desperate Housewives: The Game
- October 11, 2006 00:00 AM PST
Meet Bianca Delaware, the newest addition to the families on Wisteria Lane. Bianca is a trashy little minx married to an unfaithful husband, and together they have a malnurtured and disgruntled teenage boy. After a chance encounter with amnesia, she and her family have recently moved to Wisteria Lane for reasons she can't remember. Thus is the setting for 12 episodes of Desperate Housewives on your PC.
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Back to Basics
Meet Bianca.
The game starts off unbearably slow as you are introduced to the inhabitants of Wisteria Lane and the gameplay mechanics. Obviously targeting non-gamers who are fans of the show, there are extensive tutorials on how to use everything. From the bathroom sink to checking your mail, the narrator will guide you through even the most of mundane tasks. For experienced gamers, Desperate Housewives is too simple and gets repetitive fast; the entire game is managed by left-clicking the mouse, for crying out loud. Also, if you are new to games like the Sims, good luck controlling the camera.
Mmm, Gossip
On your very first day on the block, seemingly friendly neighbors come to your door while others may invite you over to gossip with the four key desperate housewives. You are now welcomed into the lair of the desperate housewives as your deepest, darkest secrets are everybody's business and the over-the-top drama and back-stabbing gossip begins.
Gossip time in the lair of the beast. Shhh...don't move, their vision's based on movement.
When we say back-stabbing gossip, we mean it. There is always something going on in Desperate Housewives; all of which is your business to know. Social interactions with the people that live on Wisteria Lane are your most powerful assets; and Bianca's bodacious bosom, of course. The game is all about making decisions as for nearly every question in the game, you may respond in one of three ways symbolized by emoticons. Pay attention to your inventory, as there may be some item that you may want to use for blackmail. Ah, blackmail, the bread and butter of Desperate Housewives.
To complete the game, you are assigned primary goals which must be fulfilled to finish the episode. You are also given secondary goals that you can choose to ignore in order to focus solely on primary goals and game completion. This is no walk in the park, however, as Desperate Housewives will take approximately 8-10 hours to complete. That's a lot of gossip and drama for one season.
"Edie Britt, I might have your extra-strength birth control pills, I might not. What's it worth to you?" Sucker.
Bianca loves to shop for all those special men in her life.
