Bullet Witch

Let's start with the ingredients that went into Bullet Witch: take a moderately hot female lead that looks good and kicks ass, add in a cup and a half of gun-heavy action and top it off with a heaping teaspoon of magical powers.

You then cook the whole mess according to a recipe that yielded titles like Resident Evil and Devil May Cry, among others. Sounds pretty appetizing, doesn't it? Perhaps in the hands of a better developer, it would have been, but instead of a gourmet video game meal, we were served a barf bag full of dog food instead.

Life's A Witch, Then You Die

Everything, and I mean everything, about Bullet Witch is bad. The character designs are amateurish and hackneyed, the controls are rigid and poorly implemented, the story is nonsensical and trite, the action is dull and repetitive and the overall presentation sucks harder than an industrial strength vacuum cleaner. To top it all off, the game's biggest defect lies in its terrible early-gen PS2-grade graphics. I haven't seen anything this blocky since the last time I played with my Legos!

Don't be fooled by the cool box art and the sexy leading lady. Sure, she has some cool moves--her lightning strike is pretty nice--but a little bit of razzle-dazzle can't hide the craptacular mess that lies underneath. Or, to put it in food terms, you can sprinkle some spices on a turd but guess what? It'll still taste like...well, you know.

Pros: There is nothing good about this game.
Cons: Seriously. Not one thing.

Comments [0]

post a comment

Post a Comment